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Bacolod City, PhilippinesWednesday, February 23, 2011
Web www.visayandailystar.com

My mother-in-law wants
to get back her gifts to me

Dear Tita,

My husband Ray’s mother is a strange woman. I know she didn’t approve of me to be her son’s wife but she pretended to like me so we would live with her after we got married. I wanted us to live in our own place but Ray couldn’t leave his widowed Mama who still supported him even though he was already working and earning a salary. For 15 years we lived with my mother-in-law, who ruled the house like a queen. In those years, she gave me some of their family heirlooms for which I thanked her very much. I loved those beautiful things which I told myself I would give to my daughters one day.

 But after a while, I noticed a change in Ray. He was no longer as loving as he used to be. He would come home late smelling of perfume and I knew that he was seeing another woman. We began fighting a lot because he always got angry when I would ask where he had been. The worse times were when he lost his temper and would hit me. I finally decided to leave him after he gave me a black eye during one big fight. I took my daughters with me and went to live with my aunt who took care of me when I was 10 after my parents died.

 My mother-in-law sent her maid to get back all the things she had given me. I refused to send them back as I want to save them for my daughters. This enraged my mother-in-law and she warned me that she would file a case against me if I don’t return her things. Should I give them back to her? I don’t want to have to face her in court.

Please advise me what to do.


Dear Betrayed Wife,

Do yourself a favor. Return all your mother-in-laws things at once. Why are you holding on to things that were not given wholeheartedly? She is an Indian-giver and the sooner you cut off ties with her, the better. As for your ex-husband Ray, you have to consult a lawyer to make sure he supports you and your daughters.

This is your right and you must fight for it.


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