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Bacolod City, PhilippinesSaturday, June 4, 2011

‘My wife has changed’

Dear Tita,

I am an executive in a big company here. Because of my position, I have a lot of friends in the community and am well-respected. My wife Vangie (not her real name), was a college dropout and had never held a job. We got married when she was only twenty as she got pregnant and we feared her family’s ire. She was so sweet, caring and submissive - she made me feel great as she really adored me.

After she gave birth, she complained that she was bored as she had nothing to do. Our baby girl had a yaya and Vangie spent her time watching TV or going to the malls with her sisters. I noticed that when we were invited to socials, she felt out-of-place and bored, so I let her go back to school to finish her college course. Wrong move. Gradually, she began to change and spent a lot of time going out with her schoolmates. Soon our house and our daughter were being neglected. When I complained, she would react by shouting at me and storming out of the house. She has become very demanding and so different from the sweet-adoring person she used to be. I suspect her new friends are influencing her to be this way but I can’t do anything about it.

I am starting to regret sending her back to school where she has been influenced by her so-called friends. I am very much older than Vangie and I’m secretly afraid she might find some young man she could fall for. I don’t know what to do.

CONCERNED HUSBAND

Dear Concerned Husband,

Know what? Your wife Vangie has become emancipated! It could be due to her new friends or maybe she just got tired of playing the “sweet adoring young wife” role. She’s beginning to become her own person and has matured. There are so many outside influences that could make her realize she doesn’t have to so submissive to you all the time. I suggest you have a heart-to-heart talk with her and thresh out what’s bugging you. If there’s true love between the two of you, these problems could be solved with love and understanding. Do something before it’s too late.

TITA

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